WHATCHU GOT- BRAINS OR BRAWN?
It is amazing what 30 degrees can do to turn things green. Last Monday, rain and 40 degrees spouted 5 Drafters. This week, sunny and 70 degrees multiplied that x 6= 30 (if you count LuLu and Gopher who rode before the dinner bell and Surly who rode before breakfast). The executive committee voted unanimously to allow those rides count in the official tally. Gopher's babysitter had a hard 5PM deadline, and LuLu honored the code, "leave no Drafter behind". LuLu and Gopher were spotted on the return route from Riley as the group left the big city, verification of their draft. Surly's Strava post credited the Drafters for the route (although he doubled the fun... on a FAT bike).
Drafting responsibly with 27 cyclists through the streets of Middleton is not without its challenges: 1) what is the engineering principle behind leaving water and man hole covers an inch above or below instead of level the street? Perhaps an obstacle course for those looking to up their bike handling skills. Challenge accepted. 2) the stop lights sensors on Donna Drive and Parmenter are not sensitive to bikes, even 27 of them. After what seemed like an eternity of smelling butter burgers, it took incredible will power not to bag the ride and head directly to the strategically located Culver's at that intersection. 3) while approaching said intersection red light, a silver car decided to part our green sea as Moses did the red one. Kudos to all the Drafters for accepting those challenges and conquering them with grace and respect. Thank you for drafting responsibly.
Butter burgers must have wet Cannibal's appetite as he devoured the climb on Midtown Road. Someone in the group yelled out, "We have a gap. Let's wait up for the rest of the pack." Vilks, Keez, Granny and Squirrel may not have needed the breather, but BrickO had lactate escaping from her eyeballs. As every molecule of oxygen was being diverted from her brain and other body parts to fuel the legs, she heard Squirrel, fearlessly shouting and pointing out acorns, ensuring nobody cracked their nut.
Granny, also unfazed by the climb, humbly asked how to shift the front derailleur into the small chainring. Perhaps Granny was a handle too hastily given. Change is hard, but Granny takes this literally. One gear Granny.
The post-draft festivities commenced in the back yard. The world's problems were likely solved by Z Wrecks, Skipper and Vilks around the solo stove.
Tennille may not have solved world hunger, but she brought gluten free pasta to solve our hunger. Forks out, dig in!
It was hard to miss the fashion show going on below the knees. Slim was sporting green kitty Christmas stockings, while Booker J pulled these off:
Sitting around the campfire/solo stove, Rimshot proposed photos be submitted for an official Drafter Calendar. Certainly, socks of the month will be highlighted, along with Baby Daddy centerfold. There is one submission thus far (warning: extreme cuteness and a little nudeness)
Babies are just too cute, so we can't possibly choose (no offense, Gopher). Congrats to Han Solo on registering the newest Drafter. She's dressed in green and ready to roll!
CALL FOR VOLUNTEERS: the Horribly Hilly Hundreds folks have asked if the Drafters would be willing to work the packet pick up on Friday, June 16 from 3:30-6:30PM. If you are willing, please text me before Friday. You earn a guaranteed spot for 2024. THANKS! Also would really, really super really appreciate 2-3 women to ride some of the HHH course on Sat May 20th at 11AM. You do NOT need to ride fast or far- seriously. Please contact me if you would enjoy getting out to ride with some Drafters (and HHH clinic folks) that day (thanks to the guys who volunteered- much appreciated).
Looking to up your bike handling skills? Coach Slim has generously granted my request to host a clinic for up to 10 interested Drafters on Sunday May 21. Group riding/paceline tactics, cornering, descending, climbing, crash control will be practiced from 9AM-noon, followed by lunch. A no-drop group ride 1-4PM will give ample time to practice those skills, followed by pizza. All that fun for $50. Please contact BrickO to reserve your spot. You can opt for just the AM session and pizza if you prefer to skip the group ride.
Starting next week, the Draft will return to A and B team departures. The staging area will open at 4:45, with the B Team rolling out at 5PM. The A team will follow at 5:30. The route for Monday April 17 with require more "Braun" than brains. Remember to BYO lawn chair and beverages. Grass to sit on and water provided by your generous hosts.
RidewithGPS link Drafters | Brains and Brawn
Draft responsibly,
BrickO
Riley Tavern. For Real This Time.
The Clash has a tune that sums up Monday's conundrum nicely:
Drafters, you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
If you say that you are shine
I'll be ridin’ 'till the end of time
So you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
The forecast called for rain. No doubt. But it called for rain at 11AM. Then noon. Then 1PM. The only constant was the forecast calling for clear skies by 5PM. Until it wasn't. 15 minutes before game time, the rain started to fall. The cadence of rain drops was matched by the dinging of BrickO's cell phone, as text messages from Drafters near and far came in hot. "Turning around". "Not for me". "See ya next week". Rimshot was a surprising no show. Strava reports of his work commutes on days of inclement weather are down, suggesting his recent aging event has left him a bit soft. Only speculation.
Some were savvy enough to ride earlier in the day. Pit Stop selflessly rode early so as to leave a vacancy in the powder room for others needing to don rain gear. Nemo was second guessing her fitness more than the precipitation. Silly Nemo. She may be the most senior Femme Drafter, but her AARP card is for Above Average Riding Power.
Keez changed into her kit and then changed her mind as the faucet opened up from sprinkles to full shower.
Granny, too, was kitted up and ready to Draft until her hubby advised otherwise. What did the Squirrel say? "You don't handle a bike well enough to go around wet corners."
LuLu texted to say he was ready to roll, but only if others were crazy enough to Draft. As if on cue, Cannibal and Cujo pulled up, hungry for a ride.
The only (really) uncomfortable part of the ride was the first 5 minutes, as the rain slowly seeped into chamois and feet sloshed inside of not-so-water-proof shoe covers. Once fully saturated, the ride was entirely pleasant (save some frozen toes) and musical. The cacophony of sounds from the disc brakes could be heard for miles. LuLu was in D sharp. Fortunately, no flats.
Busch Latte joined the Draft briefly, and then went MIA. Could have been that his Costco base layer wasn't as advertised. Shop responsibly. LuLu was using his head when he put on an Ass Saver. It was more like a face saver for whoever was Drafting. To that end, LuLu was the only Drafter worth drafting. The impressive rooster tail of spray off the Ass Saver-less bikes made for poor visibility but excellent hydration.
The second ride of the season is none too early to be thinking about the end-of-the-year MVP award, issued to the Drafter with the highest attendance record. As of now, there is a 3-way tie. LuLu has petitioned to be included as the fourth contestant, as he Drafted responsibly from his basement on the first ride. This will be presented to the Executive Committee for review, but your vote counts.
Cannibal had the brilliant idea to cut the route 3 miles short, making the Riley Tavern route Riley-less. To pay homage to the historic tavern, we will be repeating the Riley Tavern route next week (except for those who prefer the short pour, which will shorten the route to bypass the famous watering hole). The staging area opens at 5PM. Wheels up at 5:30.
RidewithGPS link Drafters | Riley Tavern
For those looking for a short pour, here is the RidewithGPS link Drafters | Riley-less Riley Route. From Timber Lane, skip the turn onto Mauer Rd, and stay the course until you intersect with Mid Town. Turn left and you are back on course!
Looking for a few volunteers to help with the Horribly Hilly Hundreds clinic on Sat May 20. Wheel and Sprocket has generously offered to provide bike check from 10-11AM in the shelter for those participants enrolled in the clinic. Following bike check, we will roll from the Blue Mound shelter (near the pool) at 11AM. We anticipate a 30 mile loop, which most folks will ride twice. There is sag support from W&S and the Friends of Blue Mound State Park. What is needed are a handful of Drafters to be sure all the participants are having fun and drafting responsibly. If this sounds like something you'd be interested in, please contact BrickO.
Looking for a good warm up to the HHH? Join BrickO's Drafters for the Trek 100 on June 10.
Draft responsibly,
BrickO